This is a weird exchange on FaceBook between me and someone I used to consider a friend but had to cut off once I found out they were doing something really terrible. So terrible I had to walk away from the friendship. Now I had started watching a movie called Klaus on Netflix and I posted a photo of the movie poster on FB via Instagram saying how much I liked the film. I found the film to be a magical cool retelling of how the legend of Santa started. This person decided to post "Bah Humbug" as a reply to my post share. In my opinion if you see someone posting something about something they like why the hell would you come on their post and say something negative? Its just bizarre and then it turned into a religious debate. I understand now I was right to cut this guy out of my life.  I've said it before and I'll say it again....negative folks will come for one and it is true misery loves company as cliche' as that saying is....  So the moral of the story? I dunno. Maybe its that its time to take a little break from social media. I'll be filming again pretty soon and really could do without any distractions. I wonder what the two women who run the work clinic I attend would think of this exchange below though. Maybe I'll ask them. Oh on a side note the Kaiser work clinic has given me some good info and solutions for dealing with stress anxiety. Relaxation techniques. Breathing exercises. Meditation/visualization. Exercise. It also helps talking to others who relate.

THE DAMN EXCHANGE....


(POSTER HERE OF KLAUS. I POSTED IT BELOW ALL THE WAY AT THE BOTTOM FOR SOME STUPID REASON)

My comment..... Started watching this on Netflix and all I can say is WOW.

HIM
bah humbug!

ME
If you watched this movie and that is your reaction you really do not have a heart. You actually might not even have a soul....

HIM
no I just don't like Satan..I mean Santa Claus is all

ME
Okay I get that but why not use your page or profile to promote that and not try to come on my comment and defecate all over it? The story has absolutely nothing to do with Satan or really even Santa. It's just a touching story of how the legend began. Come on man....keep the negativity to thyself.

HIM
negativity? naw, beliefs? yes
we all have them & it's nothing wrong with having beliefs...I don't believe in clause or clause & u don't believe that Jehovah is the ONE & ONLY true God & to me that's the biggest negativity of them all, but that's your belief & I don't knock it... just saying

ME
(Name bleeped out to protect the not so innocent)  you have issues man. First off you have no idea who or what I believe in because I don't discuss religious beliefs. That's my personal business and if you want to preach and promote what your beliefs are that's fine just keep them off my page and profile thank you. I don't think that is asking too much. And you of all people have alot of nerve calling me negative or did you forget what you said to me the last time we spoke to each other in person? Now please just STOP. Really. Go away. I'm trying to be nice.... 😼

Light In The Tunnel.

I went to the donut shop and stood in line and wasn't filled with a sense of worry because it took awhile. That's how I've been feeling for the longest and the owner of the donut shop used to look at me realizing something was going on in my head.

I have been dreaming. Sometimes a bad dream which is rare but mostly the dreams are just regular stuff. No otherworldly adventures with velociraptors chasing me in my Grandmothers house. Not lately.

Seems people are trying to come out of the closet around me lately. I guess folks are starting to realize alot of the shit we have been taught about religion and our sexuality is BS. Congrats I say to the rest of the world for finally catching on. And no I'm not saying this like I have all the answers because I do NOT.

Its crazy how people will come for you. Out of nowhere it seems. Its like they see you on top of the mountain enjoying the sprizzle of fresh clean cool cleansing water on your face and they wanna defecate all over your dreams. Some obsess over trying to destroy a persons happiness. Sometimes it seems impossible to get away from nasty minded individuals with too much time on their hands. Some of the worst enemies to have are mentally ill folks or supernaturally inclined individuals who have lost their way. Ask me how I know. Actually no don't ask me.

I fantasized about someone from my past. Someone(s) from my past really. Sometimes I am a cop or hero being taken by a criminal. But it usually is like that real experience where I got what I wanted and that person blew my mind completely. It was terrible in some cases yet mostly I just think of the good encounters that happened when it was something I figured would never happen in reality. The gay closeted dude who torments me either directly or from a distance inflicting so much mental damage but he secretly wants me (as twisted as that seems) Then "it" happens and I feel myself becoming sprung all the while wishing I had never got myself in that situation but it just feels so damn good when he's inside me. In reality he knows I like him but nothing will ever happen because we both resist our feelings. In reality "it" happened or mostly almost happened because he was too big to go inside me and in one case dude came just from the excitement of trying to enter me. Ain't that some shit? Here I was with a man straight out of my dreams with a body like WOW and he was the size of a beer can. I kid you not. I'm just glad he was understanding.... In one reality it was so terrible and painful and it happened in one reality on the job and we basically didn't talk afterwards. Sometimes its better to let a fantasy stay a fantasy.

The world seems insane but its not all bad. I think about my friends and the people who do good or people who have helped me along the way. I wasn't really sure what I'd be doing for Thanksgiving but Nice Monster Productions asked me if I was going to "The Stinking Rose" and I said yes because me and "Sir Nathan Of Delphia" were planning to go anyway. Still trying to not think of Brianopolis as an incredibly handsome villain because of what went down with "that film" and sometimes I feel myself wondering just how much I should be trusting anybody when so many are only out for themselves ultimately. It feels like its a struggle walking this path trying to stay positive and searching for other good people to be around. Trying not to fall into that place of thinking folks are a mess. Many are but its like unto being a bird and trying to fly up out of these twisty thorny rose bushes. It would be cool to go stay in Africa for awhile you know because plenty of guys are coming at me from there. No lie. (Excuse me I had to go blow the nose. Damn allergies) Just now on the radio (KROQ) they were talking about how people will even resist when you try to do something good for them and I think back to a co-worker telling me how folks might think you are up to no good if you seem too nice to them. I am nice 95% of the time and as far as wanting anything in return for it what exactly can another person give me for being nice to them that one can't get for oneself? I read the news and see people helping animals. I see folks coming together during disasters. Radio stations do kind things to help families in need and companies do these random acts of kindness drives. People give away clothes,toys or free food during the holidays. I have had bosses at jobs really go out of their way to help me when they knew I was going thru something. People have protected me from bullies. Teachers have provided comfort at times when just the thought of being in school felt like a nightmare. Sometimes it is those thoughts of good will towards me or others that inspires and keeps me from going too dark when the comics,videogames and all these other outlets are not enough. But the fact somebody(S!) sparked me into existence and then somebody else carried me around inside their belly for nine months....well those acts pretty much trump anything else anyone has done for me.