Just got back Sunday night from my little birthday trip to Fargo. It was quite the adventure. Things kicked off with me locking myself out of my apartment. Just as I was leaving out to my uber ride to the airport I realized as soon as I closed my apartment door I'd left my keys and all the snacks I'd packed for my trip inside. That was the first crazy incident. The second was when I got to the airport and flown to Denver wait for my connecting flight there was an issue with the pilot so my flight was delayed. As a result I got to Fargo hours later than planned. Sure they gave me a $15.00 voucher but man did United screw up my schedule. It was nice seeing Captain Liberia again. He currently has only one daughter living at home with him. He's happy his other kids moved out because they really turned his life upside down. I mean all the shit they put him through is like right out of a horror movie and its really fucked up as they blew such a great opportunity he gave them by bringing them here to the US. The daughter who lives with him now is special needs. She is about 20 but mentally around the intellect of a 2 year old. Very challenging to deal with at times and the poor child can barely speak. Her speech is alot like mumbling and most of the time i can't understand what she's saying. The Captain seems to have it down to a science but she has some serious behavioral problems.
-To Be Continued-
Part 2. So his daughter will do things like go in the fridge and take entire containers of juice into her room with no regard to anyone else and just drink it all up. She will literally eat any and all sugar on hand so The Captain has to hide it in his room along with the coffee creamer. There is one particular show on youtube she will watch over and over and over involving cartoon monkeys jumping on a bed. I feel bad for The Captain because he does have alot of patience yet it does stress him out at times and he has told me repeatedly how happy he will be when he has his place all to himself. His special needs daughter does have people to work with her during the week and she also has a job where she works a few hours however she has no plans to move out on her own. This is a grown woman in a womans body who acts like a spoiled 2 year old and she is constantly requiring attention. The Captain spoils her but mostly its probably because he is exhausted when he comes in from work and hasn't the energy to really deal. He took on a big responsibility bringing his kids here from Liberia yet at times he regrets the timing he did this move. There was a point in my visit his daughter was in the living room playing stuff very loud on her ipad and we really couldn't watch the tv in peace until I went to grab a pair of headphones I'd brought. I hooked them up to her ipad and gave it to her. Then there was another time I visited and she threw a temper tantrum when we all went to the movies to see Shang-Chi. She kept acting up and saying she wanted to leave. Another time when we went to a restuarant she threw a tantrum and caused a scene refusing to come back to the car because she suddenly wanted a milk shake or something after initially saying she wasn't interested. The Captain has probably let her get away with this type of behavior before so I suggested he just drive around in the parking lot, then over to the exit to scare her into thinking he was gonna leave. Let me tell you she came OUT of that place in a hurry. She's certainly smart enough to manipulate her dad. The Captain loves his children but they have added plenty of stress to his life and at some point he has to take control. I guess he has because he put his other daughters out. One initially ran away to NY but had to come back because that city will eat you alive and it really taught homegirl how good she had it with her father in Fargo. His other daughter had a kid with a young man who is now in jail for what I can't recall but he'd infected her with an STD and no one knew until The Captain did his own investigation or rather demanded the authorities do it after they tried to accuse him of molesting the child. So yeah these kids have put poor Jonathan through hell. It still blows my mind what he has had to endure these past few years.
I still care for The Captain but I'm really having a hard time letting my self feel anything for any man right now. I can safely say what happened with homeboy at my job scarred me. I really liked him and it did a number on my brain when he rejected me. Took me a whole year to recover seriously. The Captain will tell me he cares for me but his actions kinda deflate it. I have always known he had other people and during this past trip he admitted some of these escapades. I don't know...maybe for some of us who are with someone we seem to have this weird intuition that they are with someone even when they lie or try to be coy about it to save face or to keep you wrapped around their finger. It hurts knowing he was messing around and just not being up front with it but dude is a grown ass man and I guess the truth is he owes me nothing. No explanation. I have observed that men will have something wonderful yet they will go after something else and sometimes its simply a reflection of their maturity. Running from a real committment and only wanting instant gratification or the wham bam thank you mam.
-To Be Continued-
(Eating Kibo chickpea chips. Pico De Gallo flavor. Drinking a liquid death sparkling water drink. Mango Chainsaw flavor. -Desert is Belvita crunchy blueberry cookies whilst listening to Jack FM and fighting off a bothersome fly) Yesterday was plenty hot out. Around 98 degrees and I walked out to Chipotle for a chicken bowl and a blackberry Izze. My usual Chipotle meal. As I walked out I noticed this Hispanic guy in a truck waiting for the light on my street. He quickly put on his radio to blast some music. Rappitone I think. That was interesting. I was wearing khaki greenish shorts and an green neon short sleeved shirt and my black/white Yin/Yang cap.
That certain co-worker (who seems to be becoming more feminine by the minute) basically proved he was a psycho when he told me yesterday was his last day then he showed up at this shift. (I caught a glimpse of him peeking arpund a corner to see if I was in the conference room like I usually am an hour before my shift playing games or surfing the web if I'm not watching a movie) I imagine he was looking for my reaction but there was none because I don't care what he/she/it does. I'll admit I was a bit happy when he said it then I said to myself I'll believe it when I see it. All of our schedules have changed now and I no longer have the weekends off which kinda sucks. As tempted as I am to take the severance pay it feels too risky because I might not be able to get unemployment which would be a problem. Thing is they have me working six days straight on the weekend the new schedule kicks in and I am also not sure how my vacation days are gonna be affected. I guess I will have Christmas and Thanksgiving off as usual unless I bid for overtime. Its so crazy to me that an organization as powerful as the lgbt center is having money problems when I take into consideration how many powerful members of the lgbt community have connections here. There are plenty of lgbt celebrities and rich folks who should be doing alot more to keep this place up. I guess gay people are just like any other community. We have people more concerned with counting their pennies and serving themselves than trying to look out for their fellow man. Pathetic. Also someone reminded me the lgbt community has lost some support from allies over the years. The outrageous antics of a few have affected all of us.
I went to the movies at the grove on Monday. Really shocked myself. I guess I'm gradually getting back to the old me. Going out and actually doing stuff as opposed to staying indoors lanquishing in anxiety. Its something to suffer a breakdown of sorts and then the miracle of you coming out of it happens. Then you can look back and sy "Damn I was fucked up and I'm not gonna let that happen again" It doens't escape me that in this crazy world I live in there are certainly many others around me fighting their own inner demons. Mental civil wars going on and some people are dealing with the most unimaginable hardships. How easy it would be then to partner with someone then folks could help each other overcome together yet this is something that if it ever happens at all it seems usually only an uneasy and temporary alliance. Do I have abandonment issues or has the family dynamic become an intangible thing in todays society? (Perhaps its both things?) So anyway the move I saw was "Alien Romulus" which I loved. Theres this cute brother who plays a cyborg in the film and the relationship he has with his human "sister" is the heart and soul of this horror,action,adventure. I discovered David Jonsson in a romcom I saw on Hulu like a year ago. There is just something so sexy about a dork who is low key HOT. Yes I said that.
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