Delayed response and other strange happenings.
Part 1
I got a surprise the other day when Mr. Ninja called me up out of the blue. It was a cool conversation I guess. We talked about things in general going on at work and it was different talking to him this time because all I kept thinking was how to end the conversation and get off the phone. Meanwhile, he kept asking me if I was working that night even after I'd already told him a couple of times during our conversation. I gotta figure out a healthy way to deal with this. Dude came by my place and I think when he saw the clutter it just changed the dynamic. I still believe asking him to come up that first time was a mistake even though things kinda got hot and heavy. Perhaps my mistake was not taking him up on his offer to help me clean up? Perhaps I was so embarrassed thats the reason I didn't let him help me? Its ironic because my apartment is due for inspection next week so I HAVE to unclutter the place. Could use the help but right now its so hot and they say this weekend will be a really HOT one. Then again will it be too much temptation you know...us being in the same space alone and all? I did tell him we are just friends going forward but friends do hang out together from time to time I guess. But when you are trying to get over someone...well sometimes it takes a while for the lust to go away. Maybe in some cases it never really goes away. I suppose then it simply lies dormant. Its the craziest thing having a powerful attraction for someone and you really don't want to be because you know the other person will never feel the same way. Maybe sometimes some people do eventually come around though because a few people from my past have hit me up recently. My theory is once folks have a taste of reality they come to understand they really should have given some of us a chance because all this time ya'll coulda been in a healthy relationship.
Part 2
8.11.2023
So I'm really starting to think I've been hacked because most of my electronic stuff has been acting kinda funky but I honestly mostly don't care as weird as that sounds. I'm pretty sure someone has hacked my instagram because I'm always noticing things that i supposedly clicked on with likes yet these are things I have not clicked on so I've said it before and I'll say it again....some people just have too much extra time on their hands. But...whatever. I just had to pay my animator a grip of moolah plus a couple of artists for doing comic related work then I ordered a few things I needed from Lowes. The inspection on my apartment was done yesterday. I did a pretty decent clean up before the guy came through. I guess I did okay because he didn't take any photos and despite the clutter its organized and its actually rare for me to see a roach in my place these days because I use so many different types of poisons along with plenty of roach preventive measures. Trash with food goes in plastic airtight bags. This is usually promptly thrown in the trash chute in the hallway. Sometimes I spray the chute or toss a few pesticides down it as well. Better to overdo things when it comes to these pests. I may have Sir Nathan come over at some point sooner than later to help me remove my bed. Meanwhile I assembled a shoe rack the other day ordered from Amazon. Where else? And...tonight at work was particularly tough as my eyes were so tired due to disturbed sleep from that damn inspection...
My vacation is coming up but its unlikely I will go anywhere. Might go to Long Beach to sit out by the water for awhile but thats about it. Was considering going to visit my mother and even though Florida tickets are cheap now (I wonder why) I can wait till Oct. Especially since I already have so many other financial obligations. Still need to get that root canal done. Maybe in Oct me and my friend in Texas who I've been talking with might meet up in Vegas. I'm still skittish on dating but I'm trying to remain open to it. Someone from my past has been reaching out since we came across each other on the dating app (which I have tried to cancel my membership yet Match.com makes this very difficult to actually pull off!) Mr. Ninja remains someone I have chosen to avoid because I realize it was a big mistake getting involved with him. Maybe in the future a friendship will be possible but I can't risk that right now because although most of my romantic feelings for him are gone theres still the attraction factor. It hasn't completely faded. Yet. Out of sight out of mind does wonders for resistance though! In other news it appears the FTC is doing yet another appeal to block the Microsoft/Activision/Blizzard acquisition. My God, I am so tired of these people. Yep, I am rooting for Microsoft because I'd like to see them back on top again like they were when the 360 was hot.
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