So Monday came and went. Its technically still here for me I guess. Since you know I came in at 10pm to work and now still counts as Monday I think. Yesterday was cool. I got up and wasn't sneezing non stop for like the usual 30 minutes but I gotta try and go back to Kaiser because I'm almost out of the allergy meds they gave me. I did my laundry and shaved. Got harrassed again by my neighbors from Bangladesh. Its apparent to me that after almost 20 years of coming for me these people just have nothing else better to do than try and turn me into some sort of serial killer. I noticed someone had spit on my door. Something I haven't seen in some years. Then they raised the bar by watching me from their partly ajar door as I went out and came in from doing my laundry. And also while I watched tv they rapped on the wall as they often would do in the past to try and annoy me while I was having phone conversations. Donald Trump often has bad things to say about people who come here from other countries and cause problems well these people are the stereotype that he is talking about. I have been under near constant mental seige for years and even though I complained nothing happened and it only seemed to make them try and get to me even more. Sometimes I feel like they are punishing me for being black and gay and for actually surviving in this crazy world. I guess they want attention from me and I don't understand how you can put so much time into trying to hurt someone for almost 20 years. I try to ignore them because I know eventually karma will catch up with them. I can look at them and see they are not happy people. Things will get worse as long as they keep putting out evil. I'll hopefully be able to move and completely forget about them by this time next year. It'll be something to be able to come and go without being watched and feeling that negative energy everyday.

When I checked my mail I was in for a pleasant surprise. Detroit came through with a small yet much appreciated check to help compensate me for last years theft of my things on that fateful birthday trip. I put it to good use. Went down to Target and got me a VR for my PS4. I'd gone down to Gamestop Saturday to look at the VR but decided not to get it because I needed to do other more important things with my money. I figure sometimes its nice to treat oneself. In all honesty I think the next videogame purchase I'll make will be a next gen console sometime next year. I just have so many games to finish and it makes no sense to buy anymore at this point. Thankfully the VR came with a couple of games plus theres plenty of free VR games and demos on the Playstation store. Sony is really pushing this VR thing hard. They better make it backwards compatible for the next machine or I will look at them side eyed. Theres really no excuse for not doing BC on games now. Nintendo needs to work on that shit too.

Seems I'm gonna need to recast some of my actors for the new SOL project. Because of all the trouble I've had casting gay or Bi characters I'm leaning heavily to just not putting alot of thought into bringing in more lgbt folks. When it comes to casting I get more of the fem type or just guys who don't fit the look I'm going for. Also many of these guys are so fucking flakey. They say one thing and then do the opposite. You say you have no problem doing a gay or bi role then you do shadey shit like not return calls or texts. Just tell me you're not interested and save us both the time. STOP trying to sabotage my production. Like Tamar used to say "Get yo life" And speaking of film stuff somebody has been making some threats of lawsuits and kinda giving me grief about paying them even though I'm no longer involved in said project. I have actually been making payments for awhile because I'd agreed to before leaving the project. How can you continue to expect payment from someone who isn't involved in the production anymore? I thought I'd closed the door on that dark chapter of my life yet it still continues to come back and haunt me and stress me out.

Been meeting a bunch of guys on Facebook recently. Most of them are from Africa. I had to cut a few off because they asked for money. Why do people think people here in the US are loaded when so many of us are one pay check away from the street? Its so bad I don't even trust people once I see they are from Nigeria or Ghana. One would assume because these guys look a certain way (handsome as a mofo with muscles and masculinity for days plus a killer smile that melts ice caps) they are accustomed to people basically bowing down and catering to their every whim. When I don't behave that way they act oblivious even though I can smell the manipulative pheremones seeping thru my webcam. Then they do little things like let the camera kinda wander down to body parts during the conversation. One guy acted incredulous when  I told him I was weary of trusting fellaz from over yonder. But his wicked smile is still in my mind. He actually asked me for 500 dollars yesterday and I told him off. Someone I sorta grew up with asked me for money over the weekend and it kinda sent me reeling. How you gonna just up and ask me for anything when you haven't even bothered to be a part of my life and probably think my gayness or bisexuality is some form of demonic possession? Sometimes I get so sick of people and their shit. Just trying to survive in a crazy world where fanatics crash planes into buildings or walk into churches shooting just to make a point then you gotta put up with shenanigans from folks trying to manipulate you or defecate all over your proverbial microphone or stage that is your life. Thank the gods we have videogames,comics,movies,music and our hobbies our sports or other things to help us take a break from reality. My observation is some people don't have healthy outlets so what they do is let off that negative energy by infecting someone else with it. Maybe this is what true evil is then. A virus?